What to do?
I’ve been off since October due to mental health. I still think returning to retail is wrong for me. I could work, but I’ve a great number of phobias and issues that limit the work I can do. How can you do shift work when afraid of the dark? I can’t even go into my garden after dark unless accompanied. Can’t work at the hospital due to my extreme medical phobias. Anything door to door is a non starter, fear of dogs and agoraphobia. It’s fun being different. :-/
I’m no longer getting paid by my employer as it’s been so long.
But the idea of letting the benefit agency and ATOS scrutinise my mental health frightens me nearly as much as working with strangers.
I’ve only ever done shop work, so office jobs don’t even respond to my applications. Or I get told irrelevant experience, wrong sector and so on. The only thing I see potential in is writing, blogging and geeky roles.
I feel trapped, stuck. All the welfare reform business is not helpful, it’s terrifying. If I apply for ESA will it even exist by the time they’ve processed my application?? I have no childminder any more. She’s resigned as she is selling her house, so say I did find a job I can only do 9:30 to 2:30. What employer would accept someone like me, and on that availability? The other minders have waiting lists and higher hourly rates that mean I bring home less than if I claimed benefits… It makes no sense!
So for now I’m jobless, income less and with partners redundancy that’s not being called redundancy situation (see #JuliesCV at the top), I’m really very worried.
I’ve just got my blog and hopefully winning one of the many contests I’ve entered recently online. Fingers crossed for winning cash, the mortgage and debts are the priority at the moment.