Sometimes Good Comes From Bad Stuff 6

In October when I got “help” from doctors for suicidal depression I also got more than I bargained for. I got social worker involvement as the referring doctor, then lady I broke down in tears to, suggested I could be a danger to D.
I was honest, way too honest. I explained how I thought he was evil, how he was a factor in the depression and breakdown and how I can’t cope with him. She then sneakily asked about Jen, I describe him as my teddy bear. My little friend, the person who hugs me and loves me.

A smart mess….

Until I read my support workers report I thought they’d sent in social workers to help me, and the doctor wanted to help, seems was not actually a positive referral. Bugger. Note to self, shut up in front of people who can change things.

Anyway so after reading nasty things about myself, I find out some lovely information that the school has willing told the social workers but not me.

We know D is really clever, no denying that, I mean he writes mathematics equations with the magnets on the fridge for heaven’s sake! We thought he was in the “gifted and talented” range in maths, and for most other subjects was slightly above average. (He’s ten years old, top year junior, thought would help anyone reading the next bit to know this.)

Nope! In mathematics the school state he is “on the genius spectrum” and for English is classed as “gifted and talented” whilst other subjects he performs about 2 or more years above his age.

He has also apparently been getting extra tuition from a senior school teacher. We did not know about this! We did know school had bought extra work books just for him, as all the maths text books they had were babyish for him. When I last went to parents evening his teacher was a bit evasive and clearly found us pushy. I said he’s very smart, but at home he becomes very destructive when bored. She looked at me and explains he’s never naughty at school, doesn’t shout swear or stamp. I ask if she’s got the right file, she was unimpressed! I suggest they could try to encourage him more in English as I felt he was behind in this area. Now to me he is, but it’s a comparison thing. In most things he’s about age 14 ability but in written English homework he struggles, goes really slow and starts arguments just to avoid doing it. I reckoned he was age 10 at written English and maybe 13 ish in spoken English, but he’s better in class it seems.

Another thing is he secretly plays football at school, never at home! There’s a massive field nearby and it has footie pitch on it, and he’s never used it?!


I felt rubbish I hadn’t been told these things myself, having to read them, but then really proud of my GENIUS. The wannabe accountant (honestly, that’s his own goal).

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6 thoughts on “Sometimes Good Comes From Bad Stuff

  • SarahMummy

    Lovely to find that out, but weird they hadn’t told you in so much detail before. My younger son (Y4) is like that – I was told at the start of Y2 that his maths was already Level 4. He’s always well-behaved though, whereas my older boy (Y7) can be hard work at home – he’s an angel at school though. Sorry to hear about all the crap with the social workers 🙁

  • PinkOddy

    Oh I’m such a rubbish friend that I did not know all this. You know you can talk to me. I currently have no car and a midday pick up in the week but I’m available weekends.

    Yay that D is doing so well, hope his SATs go ok this week. Hopefully he will be stimulated enough at secondary and better at home xx

  • Julie Roo

    He’s angry about SAT’s as he has to do the test levels they say. He has to do 2 levels, one VERY beneath his level, and one a year or two under his ability. He was ranting saying that even if he scores 100% on all tests, it still means he’s officially recording as being “stupider than I really am, I am being punished for being smart? Can I boycott the tests?” and this was after a few “debates” with the teachers and with us, the teachers have explained its set by govt. not them, and even if he took a mock/old test of the level he wants, it will NOT count officially. I’ve tried to just keep reminding him, its ok. He’s exceptional, and that is why the grammar school wanted him.

    Which bit didn’t you know sorry? The social workers/doctor bit? Or the Genius bit?

  • mumonthebrink

    My goodness! What a situation to find yourself in- asking for help and being turned on. It’s so sad that “the system” doesn’t work with you to help support your son’s consistent development bridging school and home. It is just wrong!